Friday, August 5, 2011

Don't Be so Hard on Yourself!

GITK Teens,
Do you sometimes find it easier to forgive others than you do yourself?
Are you too hard on yourself when you make a mistake?

In life it is possible to experience so much hardship until we become beat down by everyday situations...  The last thing we need to do is beat ourselves into the ground.  When you feel less accepting of yourself or your actions I want you to try this mental exercise:

Have you ever heard the word "affrimation?"  Affirmation describes the process of declaring support for something or someone.

Find the closest mirror and look at your reflection without judgement or criticism...  Just take a long look at yourself.  Sure there are things you need to improve upon, but in this moment I want you to affirm (declare support for) yourself.  You're always looking in the mirror anyway, now you can do someting productive as oppose to "picking yourself apart."

Look into the mirror and tell yourself the following:

"You may think there's a lot wrong with you, but I know there's a lot RIGHT with you."

Self-affirmation opens your mind to the possibilities of an improved life without being so pessimistic about where you are currently. 
I want you to tell yourself this everyday for the next 20 days (sometimes it takes a bit longer for your mind to believe the words you speak about yourself.)
Try it!!

Monday, May 30, 2011

Wonder Woman is a cartoon character!!

This week's post is dedicated to all my GITK ladies who "run the world"

Being a woman in today's world carries many different definitions for people.  Some young ladies are trained to believe womanhood is synonymous with "independence."   On one hand independence is great!  But independence to the extreme becomes "self-reliance" and that, my friends, is not a good character trait.

This past weekend I was in the grocery store and I saw another lady with a set of infant twins (one screaming at the top of his lungs), a shopping cart full of bags and a rambunctious 4 year old grabbing for candy in the checkout lane.  The bagger asked if she needed help to her car and she quickly said, "No.  I have it..."  

The next day I observed a lady at the airport's baggage claim with waaaaaaay too many bags to handle on her own.  A gentleman also waiting for his luggage came up beside her and said, "Can I help you remove those heavier bags from the conveyor?"

"Oh, no. I GOT IT" was her response.

All I could do was to think to myself:  "It's OK to let somebody else GET IT sometimes.  It doesn't make you less of a woman."

Being powerful while continuing to express your femininity requires a delicate interplay of skill and finesse.  (Please note: I'm not referring to using your sensuality to manipulate people... that's a whole different blogpost.)  When I saw these ladies I couldn't help but think: "Where did this Wonder Woman mindset come from?"

Maybe it was The Women's Liberation Movement????   No, I don't think so.  Women's liberation was not designed to "take away" our womanly traits.  It was established to give women rights and privileges so we could be acknowledged fairly for our contributions to society.  This movement was pivotal for women but I believe we moved pass the intended mark into a different realm.

I have spent time with some very powerful women executives and discovered that there is a time to be the "Power Suit" but eventually you have to take that power suit off.  This idea of women as "Supersexualized Sensual Sheroes" has got to end.  You may remember the popular 80's TV commercial for Enjoli perfume that tried to make women think they were super-human:

I can put the wash on the line, feed the kids, get dressed, pass out the kisses and get to work by 5 to 9..
Cause I'm a woman...
I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan.
And never let you forget you're a man...
I can come home at five o'clock
Come home and read you 'Tick & Tock'
And if it's lovin' you want I can kiss you and give you the shivers ----

Women have become so accustomed to doing everything that many of us leave little room for people to come in and assist us.  Ladies, it's OK to let someone else have your back!!!  It really is.  Don't misunderstand me.  I am not downplaying our contributions.  And I also understand some women have been forced into these take-charge positions by circumstances beyond their control...  But don't allow yourselves to stay in that place because it's not healthy.  

I enjoy being a lady and I enjoy the freedom to implement my dreams as envisioned.  Yes, there are moments when I'm "running the show" but I never let those moments of "Power" usurp the times when I should step back and let someone else "run the show."

"Running the show" is one thing but "Running yourself in the ground" is a totally different matter.  

Ladies, please remember:   Wonder woman is a fantasy cartoon character...  Don't try to bring her to life!!  Make this a great week!!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Emerging & Becoming

GITK Family,
It seems like everywhere I look people are enthralled with butterflies.  I see butterflies on clothes, jewelry and even wall decals.  My cousin and I were recently talking about butterflies and she mentioned how butterflies emerge from a cocoon.  The weird part was that I just saw an episode about butterflies and moths on the children's television show "Little Bill" before she made her comment.  After watching "Little Bill" I learned that butterflies don't emerge from cocoons; moths do.  I hear countless people walking around talking about how they themselves are simply "butterflies emerging from their cocoons."  Often we ignorantly repeat comments without checking the facts so I was lead to do a little research...

Butterflies and Moths may look alike but they actually function totally different from each other.
For starters:

Butterflies have thin smooth bodies, are active in the daytime, can be extremely colorful, and experience their pupal stage in a hard structure called a CHRYSALIS.

Moths have thick fuzzy bodies, are active at night, are usually dull in color and experience their pupal stage in a soft silky structure called a COCOON.

Both insects live primarily on liquids they suck for food but butterflies eat nectar or sap while moths eat on decaying items.  Moths also chew holes in clothing & linen in an attempt to extract nutrients. Moths cause destruction whereas butterflies represent new life.  There are some exceptions to these rules: although day flying moths are brightly colored don't be fooled because this variation of moth is extremely toxic.

Should you ever decide to refer to yourself using these winged creatures as an example of where you are in life, be certain you know which one you plan on becoming.  Will you be like the moth and breakforth from a cocoon using the remainder of your life feasting on dead things, dead ideas and fruitless ventures?

Or will you be like that butterfly emerging from a chrysalis full of color (life), making the most of your day, feeding on the sweet nectar of life?  The choice is yours.  

(Oh, remember: Just because its flashy & colorful doesn't necessarily make it a butterfly! Poisonous moths can also be quite colorful so use discernment.)  

This post is dedicated to all my butterfly lovers.  Keep flying and make this a GREAT week!!!


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