Sunday, January 20, 2013

Hysteria or Passion for Change?

Happy Inauguration Weekend, GITK Family!!
Since I operate at such neck-breaking speeds usually. (Well pre-surgery that is..) I value the quiet time I have to spend at home.  Another thing about me you may have gathered from my posts is that I like watching movies at home.

With all of our out-of-town guests here for the Presidential Inauguration I got a chance to watch the movie Hysteria (2011) this weekend!  If you're a woman who serves other women in any capacity you MUST see this movie.  It really resonated with me.  I started thinking... This movie was set in the 1800's but is applicable to the women of TODAY!  Yikes!!  That's astonishing.

Charlotte Dalrymple, a charitable compassionate woman, has taped into her life's passion to help women and children living in the slums.  Her elitist image driven father is a gynecologist who helps women with his proven "treatments" for hysteria.  (BTW- hysteria was an actual diagnosis for women until 1952.  Treatment of choice was hysterectomy or institutionalization in mental hospitals. Hmmph!!)

In their aristocratic society she was charged with being reckless, insane and uncultured.  Anyway I have other commentary about this movie that will go unmentioned at this time.

The essence of Hysteria's message for me (Dr. Jeri) was the following:

The true meaning of this movie is overshadowed by its focus on the creation of the vibrator, The Jolly Molly, which is quite interesting to say the least.   
Until the world recognizes the full true worth and contributions of women we will all continue to suffer grievously.  Men who continue to fear our brilliance by shoving us in boxes and dark corners to sit quietly and look pretty do this world a great disservice!  The goal of a woman is not to take what little power men think they have but work hand in hand to improve this world for our next generations.  
I speak continued life and release to the phenomenal "Charlotte Dalrymples" I know personally.  Women like Janeen Uzzell, Measha Peterson-Dancy, Nicole Jones, Vikki Johnson, Chonya Davis-Johnson, Vicki Garriett-Lampkin, Carolyn Washington, Scyatta Wallace, Martha Park, Lissa Rankin and Melva Green.  (This list is by no means exhaustive so take no offense.) 

I want to encourage these women to continue positively changing the world for women and girls globally.

For the men who support us...
Stand with us...
Push us forward to try again...
Encourage us in our moments of defeat...
Celebrate our triumphs...
Love us unconditionally...

I salute you.  
I applaud your bravery. 
I admire your inner strength.
I honor you for not cowering in the face of our full femininity. 

Ladies, don't back down.  Press forward.  We've got a world to change!!
I love you and I'm grateful God allowed our paths to cross...
(Check out this movie)

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Needy Ladies

Clingy, clingy clingy!!!

Ladies, if he doesn't want you leave him alone!!!  When someone walks away from you please give them the space they need to gather all of their things. Your first and immediate concern should be your emotional health.  But what I have noticed in my years on this earth is that women are not raised to care for themselves first.  The general rule for women is

"Take care of everybody else and three seconds before you drop dead focus on you." 

(Okay I went off the deep end but you get the picture.)

Women have been conditioned to fight for a man's affection when the truth is he could care less about you.  When you are connected with the right companion he will care about you just as much as you care for and about him.  You won't keep score.  There won't be this overwhelming need to keep tabs on him because of your own insecurities.  (Now, don't get me wrong- I know men have done and will do things to make us feel like we need to continually look over our shoulders, pull out the magnifying glass and investigate some things.  But that's not what I'm referring to here.) 

As women some of us suffer from abandonment issues and fatherlessness.  So when a guy isn't feeling us we "lose it."  The other thing that scares some women is this feeling of scarcity.  We listen to the news and special reports and buy into this lie that there are "no good men."

I hear women say it all the time, "They are either gay, locked-up, married or womanizers..."  Well if you believe that why are you still looking for male companionship?  I know I sound facetious but I'm serious. As women we have to face our own fears in order to really see what's happening.  When you opt to cling on to a man who no longer desires you like the girl in the picture above something is wrong.

I wish there was a Static Guard for Humans I could spray on some of my sisters: "Instantly Eliminates the Cling..."

Ladies, please stop begging your male companions to stay in your life when they are ready to move forward.  I don't want to sound judgmental because I have been there too - (just call my sisters- Joslyn and Sheila.)  I'm not encouraging you to take a nonchalant attitude when your boyfriend wants to call it quits because the fact of the matter is break-ups hurt.  But you can not keep running behind someone who does not celebrate your presence in their life.  

A good friend of mine once said, "Each of our relationships is here to show us a mirror of who we are."  It may take some time for you to understand this but it's true.

One day you will look back on all this foolishness and you'll be glad you left that brother right where you did.  I'm not male bashing I'm speaking truth- In order to properly love another you must first PROPERLY love yourself.  Not preaching simply sharing!  I love you, family.

Friday, January 11, 2013

Feel Good Friday Music

GITK family, if I had a choice of entertainment it would be music....

Music has the ability to take us to another place.
Music can change your mood with one tune - it's truly power-full.
But what I like more than the music are GREAT lyrics to accompany sweet melodies.

When I first heard the song, Evolution by Oleta Adams,  I was graduating from Xavier University and headed to Meharry Medical College to learn how to  "change the world."  (Which reminds me I need to send my financial donations to both of these great schools - giving back)

I have to tell you this is absolutely one of my favorite songs to explain the ails of the human species.  I often refer to it when my mind becomes overwhelmed with 'whys'.

I encourage you to click the link below listen to the song and read along.

Once you've pondered the song and you really understand the lyrics, please "evolve" beyond your current understanding to a higher level of existence.

I really do love you. Let's grow together...

Evolution by Oleta Adams
We can travel to the planets
Drive a mile through solid granite
Thrive in all extremes of weather
But we cannot live together

We have pondered our existence
Tracked the comets in the distance
But we're overcome with blindness
By an act of human kindness

We have ventured where
None have gone before us
But in matters fundamental
We are patterned on an old design
Welcome back Tyrannosaurus
Evolution is a state of mind

We have filled the halls of science
With the bones of mighty giants
They'd all been there for generations
Buried under our foundations

It's a page right out of history
Everything is still a mystery
All except for one distinction
We can stop our own extinction

We have set ourselves apart
From all that's gone before us
But in matters fundamental
We are victims of an old design
Here's your chance Tyrannosaurus
Maybe we can get it right this time

Grab a club and join the chorus
Evolution is a state of mind

Saturday, January 5, 2013

The Real Price of Education

Far back as I can remember art has always inspired me.  My dad and all his siblings were in the arts in some form or another.  Little Mama (my paternal grandmother) had art all over her house.  Each one the creativity of my aunt and uncles.

My Uncle Raymond painted his impression of the Mona Lisa.  LOL!  When we were kids my cousins and I would run from that painting.  She was scary to say the least.  Now that I think about it his painting kinda looked like a cross between Mona Lisa and Scream!!!  (Maybe it was our imagination.)

I can say I have a true appreciation for art in all forms.  So much so - in my first apartment during medical school I purchased a bed and then started buying art.
No furniture, no couch, no table...
Wall art...

I think I had three pieces before I started buying furniture.   I guess it had something to do with my early exposure.

When I was in residency I heard the story about Ruby Bridges.  I was thinking about how the US marshals escorted her to the schoolhouse every day so she wouldn't be attacked by hate-filled adults.  When I came across a print of the famous Norman Rockwell painting of Ruby Bridges a few years later I  had to buy it.

Close-up of the Norman Rockwell painting

The name of the painting was "The Problem We All Live With."  Putting it in my home office inspired me to be my best self.  The painting also challenged me to make a positive contribution in this world before I died.  (No, I don't plan on dying any time soon but I have chosen to LIVE my life like death is around the corner- MAXED OUT!)

The painting in my home office from 2005
Every now and then I would glance over at the painting and think, "What was the real price of education?"  Some of us will never know...

Maybe you're asking yourself why I'm sharing all of this?  I have a baby cousin coming to stay with me for a while.   She has no idea she's gonna be reading books and watching documentaries while she's with "Dr. Cousin Sister Jeri!"  I'm gonna treat her like one of my mentees.

People often say they want to be a "good" physician or a "good" teacher or a "good" whatever.  In order to truly be a good anything you must first be a good person.  Part of that entails being well rounded and having an appreciation for what others went through to make your life better.

In the upcoming months.  I want to challenge my GITK Teens to read more non-fiction books.  One every other month is a healthy choice - I don't think that's too much pressure.

She is not gonna know what hit her!  Especially since she doesn't read the blog. Haaaaa!
Have an informed productive week, family.  I love you!


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