Thursday, January 17, 2013

Needy Ladies

Clingy, clingy clingy!!!

Ladies, if he doesn't want you leave him alone!!!  When someone walks away from you please give them the space they need to gather all of their things. Your first and immediate concern should be your emotional health.  But what I have noticed in my years on this earth is that women are not raised to care for themselves first.  The general rule for women is

"Take care of everybody else and three seconds before you drop dead focus on you." 

(Okay I went off the deep end but you get the picture.)

Women have been conditioned to fight for a man's affection when the truth is he could care less about you.  When you are connected with the right companion he will care about you just as much as you care for and about him.  You won't keep score.  There won't be this overwhelming need to keep tabs on him because of your own insecurities.  (Now, don't get me wrong- I know men have done and will do things to make us feel like we need to continually look over our shoulders, pull out the magnifying glass and investigate some things.  But that's not what I'm referring to here.) 

As women some of us suffer from abandonment issues and fatherlessness.  So when a guy isn't feeling us we "lose it."  The other thing that scares some women is this feeling of scarcity.  We listen to the news and special reports and buy into this lie that there are "no good men."

I hear women say it all the time, "They are either gay, locked-up, married or womanizers..."  Well if you believe that why are you still looking for male companionship?  I know I sound facetious but I'm serious. As women we have to face our own fears in order to really see what's happening.  When you opt to cling on to a man who no longer desires you like the girl in the picture above something is wrong.

I wish there was a Static Guard for Humans I could spray on some of my sisters: "Instantly Eliminates the Cling..."

Ladies, please stop begging your male companions to stay in your life when they are ready to move forward.  I don't want to sound judgmental because I have been there too - (just call my sisters- Joslyn and Sheila.)  I'm not encouraging you to take a nonchalant attitude when your boyfriend wants to call it quits because the fact of the matter is break-ups hurt.  But you can not keep running behind someone who does not celebrate your presence in their life.  

A good friend of mine once said, "Each of our relationships is here to show us a mirror of who we are."  It may take some time for you to understand this but it's true.

One day you will look back on all this foolishness and you'll be glad you left that brother right where you did.  I'm not male bashing I'm speaking truth- In order to properly love another you must first PROPERLY love yourself.  Not preaching simply sharing!  I love you, family.

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