2013 in One Word

Happy New Year!!!

My girlfriend Rachel challenged our sister circle to narrow down our expectations for the 2013 New Year to one foundational word...  Not a mission statement or a purpose letter - because that's what I usually do every year and by the time I'm done I have at least 20 pages of statements, plans, goals, target dates...  (I normally begin my new year every October because spiritually that's when I notice "the shift" taking place for me.)

On this challenge we weren't even allowed to write a sentence.  She challenged us each to choose ONE FOUNDATIONAL WORD to describe how 2013 would look for us.  I chose my word but I'm not letting you in on it.  I wanna see if you can look at my life from this point forward and guess the word I selected.

Maybe I'll share my word at the end of 2013 but hopefully by then it will be obvious!  Yes, indeed!!

Here is my challenge to you, GITK Family...
Select your word...
Just ONE word...
And watch as the world unfolds like a beautiful flower before your very eyes to make your thoughts reality.
Enjoy this year and be fully present in 2013!!  I Love you and be safe!!

Driver Wanted

Today was my first day behind the wheel since November, 2012.
 
Soooooo...

Although people offered to take me back and forth I was starting to feel like Ms. Daisy from "Driving Miss Daisy." 

Since I was just headed up the street and there was very little traffic - I was thinking "It shouldn't be that bad.... Right?"

After all it's been a few weeks so I should be ready to quickly move my foot from the gas pedal to the brake should I need to come to an immediate stop....

Hmmmmm.....

Let me sum up my next course of actions with one Patois word:  SIDDUNG!!
Looking for a reliable driver any takers?  hahahaha

Wings

The kids in my life make me smile from a place so deep within my soul... 

I can't begin to tell you how simply wonderful they are.  

I received a phone call from my girlfriend.  She was calling so I could speak to my goddaughter who was 5 at the time, "I've been trying to convince her that you are her godmother but she doesn't believe me!"  

Why doesn't she believe you?

"I don't know... She keeps saying 'If Auntie Jeri is my god mommy how come I never saw her wings before?'"

(...pause - hard swallow)

Tell her I have them folded under my clothes.

Her response from my godchild, "Tell her I want to SEE them.  Not under her clothes but I want to see them."

Oh well... 

I guess I have been hiding for waaaaay too long.  

It's time for me to unfold my wings... 

Stretch my arms out really wide like I'm hugging God... 

Take a leap of faith and FLY!!!!

(If this post scares you, you'll be ok. hahahahahaha... If you're still trying to figure out what I'm talking about go back to sleep - you'll see soon enough.)

Laughing all the way to True Joy.  See ya in the sky!! (it's sooooo beautiful up here....  aaaaahhhhh....)

Testify

This has been one conclusion to 2012!  I know this is a strange Christmas Post but I'm like Diane Reeves "I just wanna testify...  Amazing Grace it saved my life!"

A few days before I headed to the hospital to have surgery I got a call from my Charlotte family.  We had been back and forth on the phone for weeks trying to figure out why my 16 year old niece was itching from head to toe.  I just thought she was stressed out with her new school but I make it a habit not to "play doctor" with my family over the phone line.  Her mom would attempt to describe to me just how miserable Kaylyn had become with the itching.   By now she had seen 5 different doctors who prescribed her pills, creams, ointments, body soaks...  You name it, she had it.


There I was getting ready for surgery replaying the last conversation my doctor and I had in his office:

"In addition to the tumors we know about the radiologist and I saw something else on your MRI..." 

Something else?  Something like what? 

"I can't be certain what it is until we get inside." Dr. George was his regular cool calm and collected self.  His mannerisms reminding me of Sidney Poitier head to toe - they even have the same thick Bahamian accent.

Determined to get an answer I jump in again, "Well what do you think it is?  Does it look like...  Canc..." 

"Leeeeet's not put a name to it since I can't be certain until we go inside..."

The phone rings pulling me back into my home.  It's my other frister (a friend who is as close as a sister without biological connectedness) on the phone.  "Hey, J.  They admitted Kaylyn into the hospital today.  They plan on putting a port-a-cath into her and starting chemo in the next few days..."

Waaa waaaii wait!!  What?" (My mind is racing - chemo for itchy skin.)  "What is going on?"


In her New Orleans accent Joslyn was firing off information so quickly I didn't have time to question her, "Kay was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma (cancer of the lymph nodes).  They plan on keeping her in and starting the first course of chemo.  She'll probably be there for a few weeks.  She's in good spirits. We're all fine.  We take turns but for the most part we're fine!  Your niece Kaylyn is amazing.  The kids have been in her room praying and sharing healing scriptures.   But we'll keep Mema (my mother) posted, you just focus on you right now.  We'll call the house later to check on you.  Don't worry about Kay.  We're all praying for you.  You goin' be fine.  And Kaylyn's goin' be fine!!"


She was right!  It's been three weeks and we're all fine.  That's not to say this journey is over... In fact This Could be the Start of Something BIG!!!!!  Stay Tuned...

No matter what you say we still need healing

Blah blah blah!!! 

Stop with all the comments.  I am absolutely done with the conversations that repeatedly take place after every senseless killing spree in this Nation. 

Comments like: 

It's a mental health issue

He probably had some form of autism...

We need to have more regular people with access to guns...

The ladies at the school should have had guns to shoot him back...

Our schools, churches, movie theaters, malls, places of work need more security...

We need to check people's mental health records before we let them get guns...  (As if they gain access to firearms in a legal manner.  This boy got these guns from his mom.) 

Of course this is not an exhaustive list of suggestions but you've heard similar simple suggestions to this complex issue.

Maybe I'm being a little idealistic here but what we lack in America is not more guns, more laws, more surveillance... We are suffering from a lack of love.  True love.  Not the kind of love we write about in these whack songs.  Not the kind of love that is portrayed in movies and television dramas.  Not that lip service crap I  hear among religious crowds with statements like "the Jesus in me loves the Jesus in you."  What does that mean anyway?  We need a TRUE LOVE that changes people to their CORE.  

There is absolutely no way you love another then try to manipulate, berate, isolate or violate them!  The fear-based love humans display currently is the exact opposite if what we should aim for.  This fear-based love is:  

Selfish

Impatient

Dishonorable 

Self serving (usually cloaked in flattery)

Mean and Nasty disguised with a fake smile

Score keeping (you love me first and then I'll show love for you)

Short lived 

Easily provoked

Hopeless

Belittling

Jealous

Boastful

Heavily infused with lies 

that is not love, my friends....  In NO shape or form...

Our Nation does indeed have a problem and it is flat out Lovelessness!!

Since last Friday I have experienced a myriad of emotions from extreme sadness to frustration.  But now I'm flat out angry...  Reason being is that we have talked on this subject ad nauseam since Columbine and very little has changed.  How many more people have to die before we really get it?

My very FIRST grand rounds lecture as a University of Florida faculty member in 2005 was on this very subject: "The Interconnection between Unidentified  Mental Health Disorders,  Unacknowledged Pain and Gun Violence among Young Males."  I discussed the unique presentations among different ethnic groups, the different media coverage young black males received versus young white males, and the commonalities in the mental makeup of the two and how Americans seem enraged when the victims look like the characters from a Norman Rockwell painting but seem to care less if the community is non-White.  

When I finished you could hear a "rat piss on cotton."   Needless to say that was my first and LAST grand rounds during my three year stint.

Don't misread my post - I love and celebrate all cultures!  Even the ones I don't fully understand.  Pain and death in any community should cause the same devastation and hurt.  But these babies and women who were senselessly murdered really got to me...  We as human beings cannot and will not achieve the harmony we seek until we acknowledge that we ALL need some major healing... MAJOR!!!

Tomorrow, December 21 at 9:30 AM,  has been declared a day of mourning where we will observe a moment of silence to remember those killed last Friday.   I guess I'll leave my comments right here for now but I have so much more to say on this matter. 

America, we had better get our act together and I mean fast!! 

Still Healing

Hey my GITK Family!
I know many of you have been monitoring my medical progress and I must say I have learned a lot about myself over the past few weeks.  Some of the lessons I'll share with you here on my blog.

For those of you clueless as to what's been up with Dr. Jeri let me "catch you up."

A few months back my doctor shared some "not so wonderful" news with me.  He expressed his concerns with such warmth and tenderness.  He spoke slowly allowing my brain to process his medical findings.  I had a million questions:  
How? 
Why? 
Why didn't I know before now?  
Why wasn't I in any pain?  
It seemed as though all my knowledge as a medical doctor went right out the window.  For many of my questions he had no answers.

In his words over the years I had become accustomed to suffering.  "It seems as though you simply ignored the quieter symptoms and just forged ahead with your daily functioning - even though you weren't functioning at maximum capacity."  

My mind was in a whirlwind, "Huh?!! Accustomed to suffering? Ohhhh, absolutely this has to stop now." 

Right there in his office I made my decision - I no longer wanted to COPE.  Who wants to live a life where you're coping and pushing past the problem too exhausted to really enjoy each moment? Not me!!  I deserve a MAXIMIZED life so I decided to make some necessary changes to experience that kinda life!  

Now that my surgery is complete and the anesthesia & pain meds have worn off I'm asking myself "WHY didn't I do this sooner?"  (The surgery was only the beginning for me!)

Now let me turn and ask you what you're COPING with (emotionally, socially, spiritually, financially or physically) that is hindering you from living a MAXIMIZED life?  Sure, you may think you're doing well.  But is your life really MAXED OUT?  I'm talking MAXED?!!  

I challenge you to release whatever is holding you back even in the most minuscule ways!  It may feel crazy at first but I promise you will be ok...  Shooooot you'll be better than "ok." You will have the opportunity to experience that MAXIMIZED life you have always desired.  

Quit coping with less.  

Release so you can increase!!!

I love you all and can't wait to see what God has lined up for me next!  Still healing!

What is the REAL lesson?

Hello, GITK family!
I have been busy preparing for upcoming events that have pulled me away from my blogging time.  Know that I think of you even when you don't hear from me!

I like to sit and meditate in the weeee hours of the morning when it's pitch black outside and the world is at its stillest.  A few months ago I learned a valuable lesson I want to share with you.  It was during meditation that I began to truly understand: When life lessons start to repeat themselves over and over again there's obviously something you didn't learn.  In your quiet time ask God, "What is the REAL lesson?"


A while back I missed a great opportunity to make a wonderful first impression. I had a pre scheduled meeting the day after one of my trips. Because the trip was in a remote place with limited Internet access I missed an important message that was sent to me the night before the meeting.

When I arrived at the venue underdressed for the occasion I wanted to just melt into the pavement.  So many persecutory thoughts ran through my mind standing at the entrance.

Always be ready so you don't have to get ready...  
What happened to following my own advice... 
Here I am telling my mentees it's better to be overdressed than underdressed and look at me...
Why didn't I check to see if there had been any changes to the schedules...
It wasn't as if my luggage was lost at the airport I simply did not have the correct attire for the meeting... 
You seldom get a second chance so leave a great first impression. (You always make a first impression but you want it to be a good one because second chances are not guaranteed.)
Arrrgggggh! I could have kicked myself.





All I could do was head in to the meeting and put my best foot forward. Oh, those thoughts went on for months even after the meeting was concluded.  Mentally I punished myself for months over that mistake until finally I had to realize: "Jeri, you can stand here crying over spilled milk or you can clean this mess up and learn from this mistake. No one died.  You didn't get hurt.  It's okay- you made a mistake."

As I meditated I kept hearing I know all of this about leaving impressions and dressing for success so this can't be the lesson. What is the REAL lesson here?  Sitting quietly I heard: "forgiving yourself and letting go."  

Instead of moving on I found myself returning to the mistake over and over again.  Emotionally beating myself up.  Some personality types can be so harsh on THEMSELVES that you become your own judge and jury often convicting and condemning yourself for infringements.   In order to grow through any mistake we have to recognize the REAL life lesson. The real life lesson in this situation was "self forgiveness."

We are often taught how to forgive others but seldom informed that we also need to forgive ourselves.

After that revelation came to me I could feel the "burden of self-persecution" lift off of me like a weight I had carried for years. I have to say that was a great feeling.

I want to challenge you to spend some quiet time each day asking God to show you the REAL lesson.  Make this week your best ever!!!

See you soon.

Ubuntu

GITK Family, one of my good friends relocated to Ghana.   A few weeks ago she came back to the States before returning to London for business.  As we shared the day together she told me something and I want to share it with you:

I learned a new South African word from my Ghanaian friend: Ubuntu..."I am what I am because of who we all are."  

Archbishop Tutu offers another explanation: 
Ubuntu speaks about the fact that you can't exist as a human being in isolation, we are interconnected...you can't be human all by yourself, and when you have this quality - Ubuntu - you are known for your generosity. We think of ourselves far too frequently as just individuals, separated from one another, whereas you are connected and what you do affects the whole world. When you do well, it spreads out. It is for the whole of humanity.

In life we have to look beyond our needs, our wants, our desires and begin to reach out to others.  I believe one of the most wonderful things my nieces did during their Summer vacation was to donate their time on an international mission trip.  Many times as Americans we don't fully understand how much exists to connect us to the world.  International experiences teach us that the world does not revolve around us but rather we EVOLVE because of our interactions with one another.  

You don't need to venture outside of your native country to make a positive impact on someone else's life.  Next time you start feeling like other people owe you something, stop and think about what you can do to make an impact in someone else's life.  

Make every moment a great moment in your life!

PARENTS: Take Your Head Out of the Sand

Planting your head in the sand leaves you
vulnerable for a swift kick in the butt!

GITK Parents,
I typed this blog a few months ago after dealing with a series of difficult patient cases but didn't publish it because the timing seemed off.

With the recent movie massacre in Colorado I thought now would be the perfect time to publish this post.  One of the many things that concerned me about this shooter was that his mother allegedly "identified" this tragedy as something her son could potentially carry out.

My intention with this post is not to condemn the mother of this shooter but to inform parents about the importance of paying attention to your child, even through the teen and young adult years.  Some parents appear to be totally clueless about their teen's issues.  It is important for parents to give our children some freedoms but to turn a blind eye to their indiscretions and say "This is just a phase" is not only silly it's dangerous.

Parents, you cannot allow pride or embarrassment to keep you from reaching out for professional help when you see your child behaving strangely.

The following are signs that your son/daughter may be suffering from something beyond their control:
- Drug and alcohol use
- High-risk sexual behavior (taking repeated sexual risks despite previous bad outcomes)
- Awkward behavior (suddenly a loner/avoiding social interaction)
- Mood disorders like Depression sometimes present with outbursts of anger/rage
- Strange thoughts (People are watching me, Everyone is out to get me)
- Sudden change in personality
- Cutting

These are not to be seen as a cry for attention. 
Parents, I'm not coming down on you but I want to stress the urgency of you paying attention to your  teenagers.  Sometimes you can be so focused on doing well at work, paying the bills or making an impact in the community that you forget about the more important things like FAMILY.

All of us have made and will make future mistakes but when our children exhibit bizarre behaviors it may be a sign they need professional help.  Asking for help is not a display of weakness but evidence that you have come to terms with the fact that this situation is beyond your control.

Given the horrible movie massacre that occurred in Aurora, Colorado we ALL need to pay attention to subtle signs of mental health disorders.  

PARENTS, TAKE YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE SAND!

 IT'S TIME TO GET YOUR TEEN THE HELP THEY NEED TO LIVE A HEALTHY & PRODUCTIVE LIFE. 

Detach & Be Free!!

 (artist unknown)

This weekend some friends and I were sharing life experiences and it still amazes me how manipulative people can be.  This week I'm going to jump right in because I want you to learn this lesson early in life.  

People will come into your life for various reasons.  If you live long enough you will interact with someone who has ill intentions towards you.  I remember in school before I had a car there was a classmate who would offer to drive me to different places.  Her comment was, “I have to go there anyway so why don’t you ride with me.  You can take care of what you need to do while I'm out and about.”  

It all seemed simple but her gifts and acts of kindness came with a price.  She would often wait a few days before asking me to do something outrageously time-consuming for her.  I knew her intentions were wrong because she would use that moment to remind me of how gracious she was to me before demanding that I do something for her as a “payback.”  Well, it only took a one or two times for me to realize I needed to decline her "kind gestures" because her gifts always had strings attached.  

Don’t misunderstand me.  I love rendering acts of kindness to people especially the people I care about.  I also like it when people do nice things for me.  What I don’t like are manipulative people who do things with ulterior motives.  Don’t like it and I never will.  

Whenever someone tries to manipulate (control or handle a person, cleverly, unscrupulously or unfairly) you into doing something against your will they are not a true friend.  Here are a few characteristics of a manipulative person so you know what to avoid.  

Manipulative people:

1. Can be bossy or pushy

2. Use people to accomplish their wants

3. Can be very sneaky and secretive withholding details and information

4. Often lie or exaggerate the truth

5. Use information shared in confidence against you

6. Seldom are thankful.  Make you feel like you owe them

7. Like to keep confusion going in a group

8. Demand attention 

9. Are often jealous and vengeful

10. Are boastful/ “Me, Myself and I” mindset

11. Give gifts and render favors with the sole purpose of manipulating (I did something for you, now you are obligated to do something for me)

You should be able to have a friendship where the person genuinely wants to give to you with NO STRINGS ATTACHED.  I know the picture above is a little disturbing but it reminds me of what manipulated people look like.    When you find these characteristics in someone close to you consider reevaluating your friendship.  Don’t be afraid to distance yourself from this person or even end the relationship if it becomes too demanding.   You deserve to be in close relationship with people who truly care for you.  Anything less hinders you from living your best life.  Detach yourself from controlling manipulative relationships and BE FREE!!!  

It's Summertime! Get Outside

Hello, GITK Family!!

I have missed you.  I decided to drop you a love note on this hot June day!

One of my girlfriends and I were chatting about how empty the streets look:
"It's Summertime.  Where are all the kids?"

I remember when we would play outside ALLLLLLL day.  We would play so hard until we were afraid to come inside for lunch.  Every mother fussed about us letting the air conditioning out each time we came in to use the bathroom, get some water or grab a band-aid.  I can still hear every woman in our family saying, "You all are gonna either be OUTside or stay INside.  The next time you come in it's for GOOD!"  I can recall it like it was yesterday.  Us outside dehydrated with full bladders afraid to come inside.

We would go from double dutch, to "Simon Says."  I remember playing Dodgeball, "Red light/ Green light," and roller-skating on the sidewalks until the street lights came on.  (The rule was: Be IN the house BEFORE the street lights come on!)

Now with younger kids at soccer and basketball camps and older teens working or taking Summer courses its not that easy to find kids up and down the block.  I guess those lazy days of Summer are gone but they don't have to be.  Try to spend at least two weeks simply relaxing.  Some of you work so hard during the school year that any short break is welcomed.  I'm not suggesting that you sit around the house and vegetate.  Read that relaxing book you always wanted to check out.  Maybe you can learn a new skill like tennis, painting, golf, music, swimming...  Whatever you choose it doesn't have to cost a lot of money just be certain its something fun and exciting that will keep you active this Summer.

Have fun.  Be safe and I promise not to stay away so long!

What Does a GREAT Mother Look Like?

GITK Teens,
I have heard many of you complain about your mother treating you like a kid.  As you mature there will be times you're made to feel like your mother is getting in your business.  I have one small piece of advice for you.  I understand that your independence at this stage of life is paramount but you have to give your parents enough evidence to persuade them you have gained a right to more independence.

When your mom has to remind you over and over to complete chores, keep up with assignments, clean up after yourself, bath or brush your teeth daily, it makes them think you're not as self reliant as you claim.

It is a mother's job to:

•   Read your Facebook posts, Tweets, and look on to see who your "friends & followers" are  
•   Check your text messages if they are concerned "something's not quite right"
•   Scrutinize your friends to make certain you're hanging around some good people
•   Invade your space (room) and go through your things (Yes, they are looking for drugs and condoms)
•   Put you in your place when you forget she's your mother and NOT your girlfriend (I don't know who you think you're talking to)
•   Involve your father or other adult family members in your private business when they can't get through to you
•   Provide a SAFE place for you to grow up in (but we don't always have total control over that)
•   Correct you when you are Out of Order
•   Let you feel the brunt of bad decisions
•   Cheer for you when you do well! (I know she can be the loudest one at the game but you gotta give it to her... She's a proud mother.)
•   Brag to all of her friends in your earshot of how wonderfully you are doing

Be warned: a GREAT mother who is doing her job will "get on your nerves" but trust me when you get older you will look back and appreciate their parenting.  I know it sounds strange but you'll see what I'm saying one day.

To all the outstanding mothers who are raising spectacular kids I salute you on this and EVERYday!  Happy Mother's day.

Be A Parent First, the Friendship Comes Later.

Hello GITK family,
This week I want to send a special message to our parents.  I have been inundated with questions from parents on how to properly discipline their teen and maintain the parent/child boundary.  I will share a few email concerns from some of my parents.  Hopefully you can use this information to foster a healthy relationship with your teen. 

"My daughter is a pretty good person.  She used to come home from her friends' parties a little tipsy.  I have tried to get her to stop drinking but she's 17 and I can't really lock her in her room.  So instead of her going out with her friends, I have decided to let her closest girlfriends spend the night while I supply a few alcoholic drinks for them.  At least that way I know they are safe."

Allowing your teen to drink alcohol or do drugs is never safe.  I cannot begin to tell you how many times I have heard this line from a concerned parent.  It may sound like the safe thing to do but supplying alcohol for minors is illegal.  It does not foster "closeness" between you and your child.  Bending the rules for your teen ultimately gives them a "green light" to disregard your rules and the law.   It is important for parents to recognize they are responsible and punishable by law should something happen to your child or their friends under your supervision. 

"I have a friend who often brings her daughter along with us while running errands.  The daughter often jumps into our conversation to give her two cents with very little knowledge of what we are actually talking about.  What should I do in this situation?"

Place limits on your conversations in front of your teen.  Open communication in families is great but there is a proper time to include teens in adult conversations.  I remember a time when we were sent out to play or "go do something" while adults were conversing.  I understand catching up with friends and family is important but adults have to be careful of  their conversation choices especially if children are around. Some people think of teenagers as young adults so they tend to speak more freely around teens but always remember: Teens are still children. 


"My son has been coming home with D's and F's in school.  His mother and I don't want to be too strict on him like our parents were.  We try to get him to finish his chores and homework but he's usually too tired after basketball practice."

Discipline is not mean it's necessary.  For every action there is a consequence.  Some consequences are rewarding while others are more restricting.  As parents it's our job to teach children early on that there are consequences to not obeying the rules.  This young man obviously needs to be restricted from playing sports and other social activities if he is not responsible enough to finish the more important tasks like homework and chores.  If your teen is not performing well at school or in the home, they should not be allowed to continue "life as usual" without some form of disciplinary action being taken.  Here are some tips:
   - limit FB/Twitter time
   - a cellphone has the same capabilities as a computer, take the cellphone from the teen- (I promise you they won't die.)
    - find out what they enjoy the most and limit their participation in this activity
    - restrict activities for a short time- no longer than a month

Your Teen is NOT your friend. 
It's alright to be friendly and share moments and hard times with your teen but remember, teens have adult bodies with adolescent minds.  Even the most independent teenager is still a kid at heart, so we as adults have to be cautious of how included we allow them to be.

Don't Waste the Wisdom

Recently while reading a magazine I came across this poignant letter from Dr. Robin L. Smith entitled: Kneeling at the Feet of Wisdom.





This letter made me think about the wisdom shared with me by my elders. On this last day of February I wanted to send love to those men and women who took me into their homes and offices and spoke into my PERSON, not my career, not my ambitions or goals...  They spoke to my HUMANity.   Some well known others more obscure. 

Women like Penelope Green who showed me unconditional LOVE and kindness EVERY day.   Dr. Bernice Johnson Reagan whose words of wisdom weren't comprehended until my late 30's.  Dr. Stanley (Prinscella) L. Evans who was skilled enough to teach me life lessons as we worked for HOURS mixing chemical agents in the name of cancer research.  Elders like Dr. Natalia Tanner,  Edna Dancil and Dr. Dorothy L. Brown brought me into their homes, fed me and poured wisdom into me.  Dr. Lynn Smitherman who taught me how to fight effectively and never take no for an answer.  Even though these men and women made outstanding national and international accomplishments we seldom talked career talk... Only LIFE LESSONS.  I would realize later in life (much later) the importance of those intimate exchanges.  It wasn't until some of them were deceased that I realized how influential they were in medicine, science, politics, global health, community care...    

These are just a FEW of the heroes/sheroes that helped shape me as a HUMAN.  They challenged me to go farther and do better for the next generations.  Dr. Smith's letter should encourage each of us, young and old, to implement words of wisdom from our elders throughout our lives. 


GITK Family, go farther and do better!  Make this the best week of your life. 

Kneeling At The Feet of Wisdom

I am reminded that we must know at whose feet to kneel and who is unworthy of that sacred position of humility and honor. After kneeling at the feet of elders in the hills of west Africa. When I stood up it was with wisdom, power, more love, a greater belief in who I am... a clarity of identity, a sense of an authentic self. Be careful to whom you bow...MAKE SURE they are worthy of that sacred position and gift. I learned this lesson the painful way.

Let Wisdom be your eternal guide!