Grinders Are Getting' It! Or are They?

Stop Striving!

I love to see how young entrepreneurs and business owners hustle to breathe life into their dreams.  The more time I spend around entrepreneurs the more I understand the importance of “unlearning” those work habits we learned in the corporate world.  Let me explain. 

In the corporate world people are “rewarded” for self-sacrifice, forfeiting their family’s needs, slaving and taking on project after project.  At least that’s the message your supervisor relays during your mid-year evaluation.  Have you ever heard comments like this?

“Sally, I know you have been working long hours and helping your teammates with their deadlines, but it would be nice if you showed more initiative and spoke-up during our office meetings. Think of ways to increase our bottom dollar here at the company.  That’s how you make yourself eligible for the year-end bonus.“

Even though Sally has been busting her butt on the job completing all the assignments given to her by her managers and supervisors she still hasn’t made the cut.  The work ethic she then develops is that of a Grinder.  You know the Grinder!  They arrive to work early and stay late.  You can often find them working on weekends when others are enjoying their time off. 

If that’s what you think it takes to “climb the ladder of success” then by all means be my guest.  However, that grinding mentality doesn’t enhance creativity when you are an entrepreneur. Nor does it generate more revenue.  Grinders are just that, low level grunt men who hustle to get things done only for “upper management” to be rewarded for their division’s success.  Think about it!! 

As the entrepreneur you are the visionary, representative and creative force behind your company.  Ideas and creative flow are hindered when you're busy hustling and striving.  Don’t get me wrong - I’m not saying you don’t have to do anything to generate revenue, but striving is different from a strong work ethic. 

Striving; the act of making a great effort to obtain something; to fight vigorously or struggle. 

All strife is rooted in fear.  Fear has the power to kill any dream you may have.  Even the smallest pinch of struggle in any endeavor hinders its Divine Flow; at some point we need to release effort and allow things to unfold.  Let go of the grind.  The next time you notice yourself striving and struggling to make your dreams a reality, stop.  As entrepreneurs the earliest lesson you can learn is:

“Things that are meant to be will be! 

Work in excellence.  

Be authentic!!! 

Be the best version of yourself.

Trust that all things are working in your favor."    

Stop grinding!  There are only two things people like ground and one of them is coffee.  (lol)

Until next time!

Signs and Wonders

Signs and Wonders

We ask God for signs when we need to make life changing decisions but because we are so busy with other things we often miss the message.  Recently I was in Destin, Florida to speak at a business conference for young entrepreneurs and business owners.   

Before my trip I had planned on spending most of my time on the beach.   I don’t know if you are aware but the beach is one of my favorite places on earth.  My creativity is heightened, my skin becomes clearer and my concerns are released with each wave that heads back to the ocean. 

After landing I got the car rental and noticed with each mile I drove it was as if I was dodging butterflies.  At first there were one or two butterflies that danced in front of the car.  The closer I got to the hotel the more butterflies I noticed.  Two and three quickly turned into tens of butterflies fluttering all over the place.   

I noticed the butterflies but didn’t quite slow my mind down enough to really notice the butterflies.  In fact there were so many that I asked one of the ladies on the beach if that destination was a butterfly sanctuary.  Based on her response she hadn’t slowed down enough to really notice them either. 

I sat there and asked, “God, what are you showing me?”  

Butterflies for me represent a rebirthing, new beginnings, freedom, creativity and lightheartedness.  I could see that the previous months of shedding were now yielding themselves to the newness.  I could see new relationships emerging, new ideas surfacing.  What a great time to be experiencing manifested promises in my life.  I’m so glad I didn’t quit during my chrysalis phase.  This emergence is going to be magnificent!!! Keep watching. 

Pay attention to the signs in your life.  Everything means something.  Don’t miss the message. 

Autumn

Autumn is a wonderful time of year.

Harvest moons and hayrides

Homecomings and happenings 
Crisp air and cool nights

The harvesting of fruits and sweet delights

Fall is so much more. 

Red, Gold, Green and Orange

Multicolored landscapes of changing leaves

The long hikes in nature with no place to be

Bonfires with friends

Sharing laughs and tears

Fall is Fun!

Get out and enjoy it.  

Just Chill

People, learn to relax!!!

Throughout my few years of life I have learned one very important lesson:  The more we give of ourselves to the world, the more we should allow ourselves time to rejuvenate.  I often prescribe rest to my patients and clients.  The most common response I hear is lack of time.  We don't need a LOT of time to restore ourselves.  Small increments of time on a consistent basis will yield the same restorative results.

Kick off your Shoes  

If you are short on time fifteen minutes of true quiet time will serve you well.  Don't use this time to read, make phone calls, check emails or anything else.  Simply allow yourself to do nothing.  

Breathe!

If you have a difficult time calming your mind down follow these steps. I call it "Breath of Five." Take 5 deep breaths.  Inhale for a count of 5 and exhale for a count of 5.  Then relax until it's time to get back at it. 

Go Outside.

Nature is an easy way to relax.  When outside we seldom take in the sights around us.  Observe the birds, the trees and how the leaves blow in the wind.  Take time to admire the flowers around you.  If you're like me and live in a busy city use that time to people watch.  Human behavior is one of the most amusing things to me.  

Light My Fire!

Another relaxing ritual my friends and family has is spending time in front of a bonfire.   We laugh, sing, tell stories and each up with each other around a cozy fire.  There's nothing better than relaxing with friends.   What are some of the ways you like to relax and unwind?

Flourish!

Yours truly was awarded the "2015 Flourish Entrepreneur of the Year Award"

This past week I was honored by Dr. Rachel Talton, Founder of Flourish Conference for Women in Leadership. Flourish means to prosper, thrive, bloom or be in health - all the things I desire to exude. This award was a TOTAL surprise!!! I was completely clueless until they called my name and started reading my bio. The amazing part is that September 30th marks the first year of full entrepreneurship for me and it has been an eye-opener to say the least.  

Remember last year this time when I blogged about my Leap of Faith? I have received numerous awards but this one touched me for a number of reasons. To be sitting in a room full of fantastic women and be honored set my heart on fire and rekindled my desire to soar!!!  

When I look at the award there are two things that come to mind:

A tear drop and a raindrop!!!

I heard God say "For each Tear you cried and every moment you wanted to quit I took notice of you and bottled it up. And for your perseverance I am rewarding you for they that sow in tears reap in joy!"

Then my attention was brought to the raindrop and how each drop creates a ripple effect in a body of water. God was showing me how effective my one drop of purpose in the earth creates a ripple for me and others to live their fullest lives ever! Now that's thriving.

Thank you, Dr. Rachel Talton for noting my work!!!!!! And thank you to every person who takes time to read my posts, blogs and books! Our movement forward helps the world change into a better place.  

From this point forward I vow to flourish in every area of my life! Are you with me?

My Juicy Journey

Oh how I missed blogging with you all.  So many wonderful things have been happening to me the past few weeks.  

A friend recently asked me what has been going on.  He noticed a change in the way I "showed up" in the wold. I had to tell him, "It's the afterglow of my juicy journey. hahahaha"

A few years ago I joined a group of women who called themselves Juicy Butterflies.  Our lead butterly, LaTonia encouraged us to live life to the fullest and from that point I decided to LIVE!!
  
Traveling along this enlightened journey helped me get a new perspective on LIVING. As a black woman I was trained to:
Be TWICE as good as anyone else.
CONSIDER everyone but myself.
WORK HARD for what I want.
FIGHT for what I need.
EARN a good living through BLOOD, SWEAT and TEARS.
Yes, that was the theme of the day everyday for many black women:


 "Be a strong, Black, independent woman!!"

What a crock pot full of slow cooked  death.  No thank, you. I'll pass on that meal!

It wasn't until I embarked upon this Juicy Spirit journey (the name of the class) that I was rebirthed into a world of pleasure, bliss and joy along with the other butterflies!  I'll gladly take "seconds" on a meal like this!!

For once in my life as a black woman I was given permission to

LAUGH often (and REST in the JOY)...
PLAY harder...
LOVE  fiercely...
EXPLORE the world...
And my biggest lesson of them all has been the Art of Allowing. 

Allow relationships
Allow healing
Allow abundance
Allow passion

Find my BLISS place and set up house there...  
I encourage you to experience a new journey to your bliss place.  Be on the lookout for my upcoming announcement!  Here's a hint: Coming to a city near you!!

Until next we meet I'll be preparing my plate for more yumminess to come!!  
Here's to heart warming smiles, sweet kisses and deep belly laughter from my world to yours!!!  Stay tuned I have a surprise gift for you all at my website: www.drjeridyson.com



Dr. Jeri
President, CEO
Dyson Consultants Worldwide, LLC
"Helping Others Passionately Pursue Purpose one global citizen at a time."

An Intimacy Expert?!

Get this. The other day my father came to me while editing my business cards and said, "You may not want to tell people you're an intimacy expert?  When I was at the Washington Post they did a feature on sex experts who would go around having sex with people to show them how it's done."

You can not begin to imagine the look on my face when he said that to me.  I wanted to bust out laughing in his face but he was so serious.  ("Bless his heart," I thought to myself.)

Instead of laughing I decided to educate.  "Daddy, what do you think of when I say intimacy expert?"

"That's the person who has sex with people and shows them how to do it.  Right?" he responded.

By now my chocolate face is completely red and all I could say was, "Daddy, are you kidding me right now!!!  Did you just meet me?!!!"  

As time passed I thought about others who may be confused on the subject of intimacy and it's TRUE meaning.  The best description I found is from Matthew Kelly.

Having intimacy means exposing our secrets. Being intimate means sharing the secrets of our hearts, minds, and souls with another fragile and imperfect human being. Intimacy requires that we allow another person to discover what moves us, what inspires us, what drives us, what eats at us, what we are running toward, what we are running from, what silent self-destructive enemies lie within us, and what wild and wonderful dreams we hold in our hearts.  This is the greatest gift we can give to another human being: to allow him or her to simply see us for who we are, with our strengths and weaknesses, faults, failings, flaws, defects, talents, abilities, achievements, and potential.Intimacy requires that we allow another person into our heart, mind, body, and soul. In its purest form, it is a complete and unrestrained sharing of self. Not all relationships are worthy of such a complete intimacy, but our primary relationship should be.

The funniest part about intimacy is that most humans desire to be liked/loved for "who they are" but fail to fully open themselves to another person for fear of rejection?

Think about it.  Most people will say they are fine when in fact they are hurting on the inside.  So many people go through life putting on airs and fronts for so long that they themselves begin to believe the lies they tell.

Be honest. Most people think of sex when they hear the word intimacy.  In fact if you were to google the word intimacy you would land on more sites about sex than intimacy.  

Until we fully understand it's true meaning we can never have the type of love we say we want ~ (And I'm not only speaking in terms of romance.)  In order to truly LIVE you must be bold enough to be your TRUE self - the good, the bad, the ugly, the smelly, the funny, the angry, the fullness of you.

That is why I am here:  to help people unveil the true them and be alright with themselves first before they expect others to be alright with them.


Remember intimacy requires one to share every aspect of themselves with another.  That's a bold kinda living and loving!

Until next time!

P.S. ~
Happy Father's Day to my one and only Dad who thinks his daughter is a sex trainer.  (Gotta love him.  It's too late to send him back for a refund!!!)

Working, Dreaming and In betweening

In my last post (Reignite Your Dreams) I encouraged my blog family to DREAM.  Dreaming is wonderful exercise for the imagination.  The more you dream the more you allow great things to come into your life.  My only concern is the dreamer who fails to implement the steps necessary to make the dream a reality.

I've noticed in life there are three types of people:
1. Dreamers (those whose ideas or projects are considered audacious or highly speculative; one living in a world of fantasy.)
2. Workers (those concerned with ordinary activities, business or work)
3. Those with a nice combination of 1 and 2.

I found the picture below on a site I love to visit The flip flop CEO.  It shows you the perfect combination of dream, work and play.

Not to oversimplify things but I often see dreamers who don't want to do the work and workers who lack vision.  A healthy dose of both is what you need to manifest your desires.  One thing I know for certain is that we can dream all day but when we don't make plans towards accomplishing our goals the dreaming is in vain.

Let me give you an example.  I have two former colleagues both Pediatricians.


One dreamed of becoming a body builder and the other dreamed of becoming an actor.   They didn't just sit around imagining themselves doing what they wanted.  They got up and began to take the necessary training to make their dreams a reality.  One sought out a licensed trainer known for creating champion bodies and the other began taking acting lessons and auditioning for tv and film.

Neither was fully convinced that these journeys would be easy. In fact they both found themselves working even harder to accomplish these new dreams.

You may be asking, "What does any of this have to do with me?"

It's just my long-winded way of telling you:

"Any dream you desire to manifest will require some commitment, elbow grease and work to make it a reality." 

Next time you get to the point where you find yourself crippled with dreaming get yourself in gear and get it going.  Keep Moving towards your dreams.

Until next time!

Reignite Your Dreams!!

Have You allowed your dreams to die?  Do you feel like it's too late in life to accomplish what's really in your heart? Well it's NOT too late!!

It's alright to dream.  In fact I encourage you to dream!

Recently I posted the above video of a woman in Texas who has a 3,000 square foot closet.  The closet is three levels and full of the finest garments, shoes, handbags and jewelry.

My intention in posting the video was to encourage women to dream about more.

Her closet was definitely larger than most people's houses but hey, it's what she likes and who am I to say what she can and cannot have?  That's not my place.  Listen, you may never want a closet that big. I just wanted to show people the possibilities.  Honey, some of these folks were NOT ready!!!
In my intention to stimulate people's imaginations I immediately started receiving such comments as:




That's too much!  She is ridiculous!!!

I'm concerned about her spiritual stand with God.

Too many possessions is sin.

I would never have a closet that big with all the homeless people in this world! 


What?!!  People, you're missing the point!  They questioned the woman's spiritual position, her morals and even her stand with God.  Really?  The balance in dreaming is that we need to be ready for more yet grateful for what we currently have.

The comments became so much about their personal preferences being placed on that particular woman that it led to a debate about God's desires for people and overindulgence.

They missed the entire purpose of the post.  I nicely went through the feed since it had taken a "hard left" (another term for off the subject) and deleted all comments about God and God's plan for those with money... The essence of their comments was "If a person has money they clearly are not in a close relationship with God."  Now if I were to interpret their comments as the expression of the negative root emotional relationship they have with money/abundance they would automatically deny it because it sounds judgmental when it's placed before you so plainly.

What was even more shocking is that the very people who judged this lady based on a 3-minute showcase video are the same ones who believe God has divine plans for them that include wealth, abundance and more.

Not judging simply reflecting some root areas within us that must be honestly dealt with before we can truly walk into the life we have been believing for for soooooooo many years.  I leave you with this one phrase I always share with my friends: "YOU CAN NOT HAVE WHAT YOU DESPISE."

Many people will have to sit with this post for a minute and examine their own hearts.  For once I'm asking you to truly examine your relationship with abundance/money before you comment about this post.  I may respond and I may not... But this is one space where you are free to express your view and it will NOT be deleted.

I encourage you to dream.  Or as my business coach Zenovia Andrews says, "Dare to Dream!"  It doesn't hurt you in the least to envision a brighter, wealthier, more spiritual life than the one you have currently.

It is not sin to attain wealth.
It is alright to dream!
It is your birthright to possess everything that belongs to you!

Need help stimulating your imagination?
Meet me in Detroit, Michigan for the Generation 2 Generation Growth Weekend http://eveningwithDrJeri or
Catch me at Zenobia Andrews' Dare to Dream 2015 Tour in Charlotte, North Carolina  www.dare2dreamtour.biz

Until next time.  Be Awesome!

When to Move On in a Relationship

Spring is in the air and we all know what that means, as the flowers blossom so do our love relationships.

Love is always fun.  Well, it should be anyway.   It never ceases to amaze me how ladies fail to trust their own gut when it comes to romantic relationships.  Sometimes we want to be in a relationship so badly that we forfeit our personal needs just to say we are "in a relationship."

Spring is in the air and the warmer the weather becomes the more those of you without a "Boo" will long to be "Boo'd up."   There is absolutely nothing wrong with being in a relationship but your goal should be to connect with someone who is also attracted to you.

We live in a time when people don't like reading so I decided to share a short video to help women understand men.  Take a look...

I will be rolling out more videos about relationships and dating.  To stay up to date on what's going on with me visit www.drjeridyson.com and sign up for my mailing list.  Talk to you soon!

Four Ways to Avoid Self-Sabotage

Happy New Year, blog family!

I'm certain you have prepared your resolutions and goals for 2015 like so many others.  Before you start working towards manifesting those goals I want to share a few tips that will keep you on the right track.  In previous blogs/podcasts I discussed ways to write your goals and keep them measurable.  (Click this audio link http://www.blogtalkradio.com/drjerispeaks/2011/01/08/new-year-new-you-how-to-keep-those-ridiculous-resolutions for details on setting measurable goals at the beginning of the year. )  This time I thought I would give my readers the four obstacles to avoid self-sabotage this year.  Self-sabotage is doing the very thing that prevents you from moving forward to your next big thing be it romantically, fiscally, vocationally or any other "ly" you can think of.  It's time to set goals and reach them.   

Did you know you can actually trick yourself into thinking you're achieving what you set out to achieve when your actions are taking you further away from what you are supposed to be doing?  Yep.  It's possible to work hard and fool yourself away from your predestined path. Here are a few examples:

  

1. Helping a friend with their noble cause!  I can not begin to tell you how many people will call on you to help them complete their project.  Don't get me wrong I wholeheartedly believe in the ministry of helps but at what cost?  You can not afford to pour your all into another person's vision only to be left too exhausted to complete your mission.  You will need to temper yourself when it comes to volunteering for other's missions.  Even if it's a paid agreement remember balance is the key to happiness.  When it's all said and done that good feeling of helping another in their life's dream will be fast fading when you realize their dreams are manifesting while yours are at a stand still.

2. Opting for quantity over quality. People spend too much effort trying to connect with people who don't want to stay connected to them.  My sister, Sheila and I were talking this weekend about her family's business.  During her training she would stress to their service providers the importance of giving perks to your most valued and loyal clients - similar to a points program for airlines and hotels.  She said there are two types of clients/customers.  The first is the one who has no commitment to you or your business. They want the most stuff for the cheapest price and will give you the hardest time in servicing them.  The second customer is the faithful customer who appreciates your service/work and will maintain a working relationship with you over time.  All you need to do is produce quality work in a timely manner and they will be happy.  These are the same ones who will refer others to your business. Always invest your time, talents and business perks in the second group.  Stop investing your creativity and money to capture the hearts of people who don't value what you uniquely bring to their life.   

3. Allowing life's dark moments to distract you.  Each of us will experience setbacks, disappointments, breakdowns and upsets from time to time.  These lows are never cause to abort the plan altogether.  We all need varying amounts of time to get ourselves together, re-strategize and heal but don't lose yourself during those down times.  By all means take some time out but never use that at a sign to stop pursuing your passion.  

4. Being too available!  TIME management is your most valuable asset.  Since I have resigned from my full-time job people have it in their heads that I can sit and chit-chat with them any time they feel they need to reach out.  Not so!!!!  When you own your own business it is mandatory that you value your time like you did when you were working for another company.   "If you're not in the habit of treating your business like a true business everyone else will treat it like a hobby," paraphrased from my business coach Zenovia Andrews.  Offer people a time slot and stick to that time.  The best way to lose track and miss your goals is to allow people to infringe upon your work time.  Sure I understand that your life's work may be fun and pleasurable but it's still your work.   I don't care if you're meditating, exercising, doing research, meeting on a conference call, eating lunch or finger painting!  It's your time.   Create a schedule and stick with it.  Many of the wealthiest people I know maintain strict calendars.  Time is something you can't recover so don't waste it.

Visit me at www.drjeridyson.com and let me know which one you may have the most challenge with this year.  I promise to help you be accountable in accomplishing your goals for 2015!  See you at the finish line.